Hello weblogging world!
So lately, I’ve been contemplating what makes a crush so….agitating yet riveting at the same time. I personally dislike having a crush. It makes me more anxious than I should be and I begin to really question myself. I hate it because I already have a lot of self-doubt and wondering how another person feels about me is NOT something that I need.
A crush is initially fun because it’s fun having someone you like. It’s nice to look forward to something or someone even. It gives you a little spring in your step knowing that you will see him/her today. I like the tiny rush it gives me thinking about how my crush was nice to me or something that he said that was a little sweet.
But just as high as a crush gets me it also pushes me low. If something happens that’s slightly out of context of my beliefs on the situation I freak out. I begin doubting myself simply because someone else doesn’t find the time to contact me. It’s annoying and let me tell you, it doesn’t really do good on the self-esteem.
I end up feeling more useless than anything else when I like someone else. I don’t like the feeling of doubting myself because of something someone else did. I hate having my thoughts dominated by something I am trying really hard not to think about. It makes me in a sense feel less independent. And I absolutely hate it.
Do you guys feel the same way?
Until next time,